Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Someday

I find if i am not careful I begin to live in someday land. You know the place, you might live there too. It is a land filled with dreams and hopes, a land filled with I'm gonnas and when things are more together. You know, someday meaning not today. The single biggest difference between someday and today is a nasty four letter word beginning with 'F'... fear. I don't like to talk about fear, I don't even like to admit there are things that I am afraid of, but the truth is unavoidable.

What fears are stopping me from making someday, today?
My biggest fear is not being able to provide for my family. The most common thought which follows someday in my vocabulary is this, someday I will be used by God to be a new church planter. When asked why I don't just go out and do this I have come up with all kinds of noble answers like, well it would not be responsible to the church I am at, or I am not sure if my annual conference or denomination is ready for a new church plant. While one or both of these answers are true, they are really smokescreens for my fear. What is holding me back is not a sense of responsibility, or a sense of needing permission from an earthly organization, it is fear of being able to make it. Making it includes providing for my family, and making it means being able to be successful in beginning a new church. There I said it, now I have to deal with it.

What is the opposite of fear?
The term used by Kerry and Chris Shook is ridiculous faith. This is the faith David had facing Goliath. This is the faith the apostles had as they began the church. This is the faith many who are now mt cloud of witnesses have displayed. It is not a play-it-safe kind of faith. It is the kind of faith that might get you into some sticky situations, but it is exactly the faith we are all called to have.

So what is a person to do? Step one, pray, step two take action. Step three, refer to step one. I am going to do whatever it takes to make someday today. So that when God opens the doors, or brings the nest turn in my journey i will be ready. Not necessarily ready for what lies ahead, ready to walk with ridiculous faith.

1 comment:

Alan said...

You're welcome Aaron. This is a challenging book. I hope lots of folk are reading your blog on it as I know it will be thought provoking. A great book that I both love and hate.