Tuesday, June 24, 2008

The Struggle of Facing Yourself

As a pastor I get the opportunity to meet and be around people all the time. Some of the people who I am around are more challenging than others. When I first heard the phrase Extra Grace Required person, I was a little put off, but now understand it clearly. Yet no matter how many EGR people I work with there is always one person who gives me greater fits. The is always one person who cannot quite seem to get their head around things. There is always one person who seems slow to get the point. That person is me.

The Apostle Paul stated is this way, I do not do what I want to and I do what I do not. However, I think it is more than that. I so desperately want people to draw as earthly close to God as possible. I want the same for myself. Because I know when are as close as earthly possible to God, we are more easily lead by God. We hear the voice of God more clearly. Yet there is a bigger challenge, doing what God says.

After several years of seeking I am the most sure what God wants for me to do than I have ever been. While that is the case, I am having trouble following through because of what it will mean to follow that path. There is much uncertainty. There might be times when safety and comfort will be challenged. And the classic battle is under way.

At the end of the day I am left to face myself. Some days this is very easy, others not so much. It remains true, the greatest struggle is with myself.

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